Hi, it’s Skye on the Dóchas blog, here to talk with you about decision-making and how you know if you’re making the “right” choice.
Sometimes the pressure of decision-making can feel paralyzing. You may find yourself frozen with indecision, afraid that you’ll get it wrong.
But is it even possible to truly know if your decision is the “right” one? And is that even the part that matters most?
Why Decision-Making Feels Different for Everyone
Uncertainty comes with big choices, like buying a house. Other times, it might show up in smaller decisions, like what you order for dinner. For you, decision-making might feel effortless sometimes – you might not even notice the pressure at all. How you handle these experiences can stem from what you were taught, the family you grew up in, your experiences, and a myriad of other reasons.
Who you are, and the way you behave, is shaped by a complex interplay of biological, psychological, social, and environmental factors.
When Excitement Turns to Overwhelm
You might remember trying to make a big purchase after saving for years. The excitement can quickly turn into overwhelm, as you worry about making the right choice. Even after finding something you like, you might fear that a better option is just around the corner. This can drain your time and energy, leaving you unsure if any choice is truly right.
Learning from the Decision-Making Process
The worst-case scenario is rarely as bad as it seems.
When you’re faced with an important decision, making the right choice can feel overwhelming. Yes, some decisions have lasting consequences, but more often, you have the ability to make a new choice once you have more information. Remember: what you want can change over time. By waiting too long, you might slow down your own learning about what you like or don’t like and underestimate your ability to cope, make decisions, and adapt. Even as you develop these skills, you may occasionally fall into the same thinking traps – and when that happens, it’s important to have compassion for yourself.
Alicia wrote a great blog on strengthening your self-compassion “muscle”, give it a read!
Build Confidence Through Decision-Making
Your life is much more complex than making a clear “right” or “wrong” choice. Expecting that every decision you make will be the “right choice” isn’t realistic.
When you make decisions with the information you have, you give yourself the chance to learn and grow over time. This strengthens your decision-making, critical thinking, and problem-solving skills, while also building your self-confidence, self-efficacy, and comfort with risk or the possibility of making mistakes. By developing these skills and gathering the right information, you set yourself up to make the right choice. You can also become more comfortable being flexible, following your needs in the moment, and adjusting your decision as those needs change.
Does Saying “No” Make You a Failure?
Making the “right” choice can feel impossible when something you’ve committed to doesn’t turn out the way you expected. Imagine you trained for a marathon and realize it isn’t as rewarding as you thought. Rather than continue training with the race approaching, you decide to stop and not run. Instead of forcing yourself into something that doesn’t serve you, use your disinterest as additional information to guide your next steps.
This approach helps you learn and grow, giving you the confidence to adapt and ultimately support decision-making without seeing it as a personal failure or a “wrong” decision.
Embracing Flexibility in Decision-Making
Moving away from rigidity and toward flexibility can bring huge benefits.
You will learn, grow, and adjust with much less shame or guilt. By embracing self-compassion in your decision-making, you reduce stress and encourage personal growth, and feel more confident in making a choice, helping you lead a more fulfilling and authentic life.
If you’re looking for help with navigating life’s big decisions, feel free to reach out to Dóchas at 780-446-0300 or info@dochaspsych.com. Book an in-person (Spruce Grove) or virtual (across Alberta) appointment with one of our therapists here. Book a FREE 15-minute meet & greet with Skye here.
About Dóchas Psychological
Dóchas Psychological Services is a well-established and trusted therapy clinic located in Spruce Grove, Alberta. At Dóchas we value the idea that everyone deserves a safe space. Through connection and education, our team works hard to build a trustworthy relationship with each of our clients. It is our goal to create a community for our clients to feel like they belong.
Disclaimer
Information provided through Dóchas Psychological Services blogs or vlogs is meant for educational purposes only. They are NOT medical or mental health advice. You can read more about our disclaimer here.
